https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNHXPFDEeFY
You may be familiar with film studio apartment The Asylum , whose money - making tactic is releasing low - budget , unapologetic clones of Hollywood blockbuster with the utmost contemporaneousness . ( See : Alien Vs . Hunter , Transmorphers ) . And for their forthcoming “ mockbuster ” of The Hobbit — Age of the Hobbits — The Asylum is pulling some knotty semantic gymnastics .
According toThe Hollywood Reporter , Bai Ling star vehicle Age of the Hobbits ( discharge day of the month : December 11 ) has landed The Asylum in a legal Shelob WWW with the powers behind the cinematic adaption of J.R.R. Tolkien ’s Koran The Hobbit ( release date : December 14 ):
Lawyers for Warner Bros. subordinate New Line Cinema , which is grow The Hobbit , and The Zaentz Co. , which controls trademark rights to the record , have threatened Burbank - establish The Asylum , argue that its upcoming years of the Hobbits violate the trademark in the protect phrase and threatening legal action if it does n’t change the title .
A lawyer for The Asylum was quick to defend the moving picture ( whose tagline is , “ They ’re not Tolkien ’s hobbits … they’re real ” ) . The studio ’s attorney emphasise that the titular Hobbits are obviously specimens of Homo floresiensis , an Indonesian hominin that ’s believed to have go extinct12,000 years ago :
eld of the Hobbits is about the real - living human subspecies , Homo Floresiensis , discovered in 2003 in Indonesia which have been uniformly referred to as “ Hobbits ” in the scientific community [ … ] As such , the use of the term “ Hobbits ” is protected under the sound doctrine of nominal and traditional clean use . Indeed , a simple Google search of Hobbits and archaeology reveals dozens of clause bear the term “ Hobbit(s ) ” in the rubric .
And like any good archeologic dramatic event that places a premium on the fogy track record , Age of the Hobbits features fire - breathing ( komodo ? ) Draco :
In an age long ago , the last small town of clever , peace - fuck Hobbits is attack and enslave by the Java Men , komodo - worshiping , dragon - riding cannibals . Now the untested Hobbit Goben , along with his forefather and sister , must seek help from the “ giants ” ( human hunters ) to find the Javas ’ lair and rescue the last surviving Hobbits , Goben ’s mother among them . In their seeking to destroy the Javas , the heroic partnership of humans and Hobbits will translate both species forever .
Given this synopsis and the wholesale hilariousness of everything befall here , I ’d say we ’re mere hours from discovering that The Asylum has theUnfrozen Caveman Lawyeron retainer .
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