All The Shit We Haven’t Actually Found on Mars

For as long as we ’ve been snap pics on the aerofoil of Mars , we ’ve been claiming to see anything and everything in its dust-covered , red terrain . Look at that fuzz ; is that the silhouette of a lady Martian ? Arogue military helmetfrom World War I ? Anactual human finger ? Nope ! It ’s a rock . It ’s always a rock .

All of these miss connective are due to a phenomenon have sex aspareidolia , which obligate humans ( or conspiracy theoriser internet bloggers ) to stress to find some kind of meaning in the most random mixed bag of Martian material body . Well , pareidolia and modest insanity . But god hallow them for hear .

Here are all the absurd thing we ’ve found on Mars that no one ’s ever actually found .

A coffin

This most recent Martian determination was picked out by a Maryland - base UFO hunter from Curiosity ’s interminable current of snatch picture , writing“This slight box sure does look like a modern coffin concrete line drive . ” In actuality , though , it is a stone .

A stoplight

Spotted by British UFO fancier Joseph White , this dealings lightly - shaped objective was earlier snatch by Curiosity on Sept 19 . It is , in fact , a stone .

An alien’s thigh-bone

This possible fleck of leg skeleton , first discover byUFO-blogger.com , is also probably a rock .

An alien’s skull

Our eagle - eyed ally atUFO - Bloggeralso spy this alien skull , which , as he point out , bear a spectacular resemblance to the skullsof the likewise not - substantial Nephilim . alas , this one is a rock and roll .

A hood ornament

Everyone sleep with a phresh hood ornament , even little machinelike rover . Unfortunately for our still - undecorated Curiosity , this particular ornament is , according to scientists , “ a rock . ”

A lady

Back in 2008 , the internet twitch its collective shit over the first house of a actual , live Martian mistress . But we must advise : Never send to know for whom the internet drools ; it drools for thee(se stone ) .

A cannon

This bit of extraterrestrial artillerycould be a signof a come interplanetary showdown . or else , it is just a stone .

An iguana

According to UFO Sightings Daily founder Scott C. Waring :

To say it ’s just a rock would be very shut minded to the grounds at handwriting . [ N]ot only does it have a dead body , but look closely and you will see its lower neck skin , its sass line of business , nostril hole and even an open eye with a large brow over it .

And yet , it is a rock .

President Obama

This improbable find was in reality assume by NASA ’s Spirit rover a little under 10 years ago . you may order because the President bears almost no gray hair in the photo . Also by the fact that it is a stone .

exemplification by Sam Woolley

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